For the love of God, I'm 29 today.

Right now I'm "vacationing" at my parents house, wearing sweats I received as a Christmas present when I was 15 with my high school tennis sweatshirt, with my brand new haircut. I look around the family room filled with pictures of me and my family and so many memories and think how so much and so little has changed at the same time.

I'm heading to the casino later. I hope my financial status can change in one pull of the slot machine lever.

Treat yourself to something today. My thoughts will be with you as I celebrate the first day of the last year of the second decade of my life.

This morning I had the unfortunate displeasure of wearing freshly washed jeans. I kept wondering if my butt got bigger from all the turkey I ate or was it the freshly washedness of the jeans.

I hate when jeans are part of laundry day. The aftermath is cringeworthy.

I stole this from Wayne.

(X) smoked a cigarette
( ) crashed a friend's car
(X) Got drunk with a good friend (Don't you read this blog?)
( ) stolen a car
(X) been in love
(X) been dumped
( ) shoplifted
(X) been fired (but I was rehired the next week)
(X) been in a fist fight
( ) snuck out of your parent's house (Sneaking in was the tricky part)

( ) been arrested
( ) gone on a blind date
(X) skipped school
(X) seen someone die
(X) been to Canada
( ) been to Mexico
(X) been on a plane
( ) purposely set a part of yourself on fire
(X) eaten Sushi
(X) been skiing.. snowboarding (my favorite athletes...too bad I cant be considered one of them. wasn't very good.)
(X) been moshing at a concert
(X) taken painkillers (Wisdom teeth removal)
(X) love someone or miss someone right now
(X) lain on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(X) made a snow angel
(X) flown a kite
(X) built a sand castle
(X) gone puddle jumping
(X) played dress up
(X) jumped into a pile of leaves (the other kids and I got in trouble because the neighbor had just raked them...oops)
(X) gone sledding

(X) cheated while playing a game
(X) been lonely
(X) fallen asleep at work/school
( ) used a fake id (went to school in India where it is legal to drink at any age)
(X) watched the sun set
(X) felt an earthquake/tremor
( ) touched a snake (ew Wayne you did that?! You are so Fear Factor!)
(X) slept beneath the stars
(X) been tickled
(X) been robbed (I caught the bitch)
(X) been misunderstood

(X) pet a reindeer/goat
(X) won a contest
(X) run a red light (pretty much every time I drive)
( ) been suspended from school
( ) been in a car crash (fender bender)
(X) had braces
(X) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night (more like an hour. more than once)
(x) had deja vu
(x) danced in the moonlight
(X) liked the way you look
( ) witnessed a crime

(X) questioned your heart
(X) been obsessed with post-it notes
(X) squished barefoot through the mud
(X) been lost
(X) been to the opposite side of the country
(X) swum in the ocean
(X) felt like dying
(X) cried yourself to sleep
( ) played cops and robbers
( ) recently colored with crayons
(X) sung karaoke

( ) paid for a meal with only coins
(X) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) made prank phone calls (I'm so bad at it!)
( ) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) danced in the rain
( ) written a letter to Santa Claus (I never believed in him)
( ) been kissed under a mistletoe (I'd like that though!)
(X) watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(X) blown bubbles
( ) made a bonfire on the beach

( ) crashed a party
(X) gone roller-skating
(X) had a wish come true (I saw Bono didn't I?)
(X) worn pearls (I'm not a pearly person)
( ) jumped off a bridge
( ) ate dog/cat food
( ) told a complete stranger you loved them
(X) kissed a mirror
(X) sung in the shower
(X) had a dream that you married someone
( ) glued your hand to something

( ) got your tongue stuck to a flag pole
( ) kissed a fish
(X) sat on a roof top
(x) screamed at the top of your lungs
(X) done a one-handed cartwheel
(X) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours (My parents didn't appreciate that phone bill)
(X) stayed up all night
( ) didn't take a shower for a week
(X) pick and ate an apple right off the tree
(X) climbed a tree
( ) had a tree house
(X) are scared to watch scary movies alone

(X) believe in ghosts
( ) have more then 30 pairs of shoes
(X) worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
( ) gone streaking
( ) gone doorbell ditching
( ) played chicken
(X) jumped into a pool/hot tub/lake with all your clothes on
(X) been told you're hot by a complete stranger
(X) broken a bone (my pinky finger...twice!)
(X) been easily amused
(X) caught a fish then ate it

(X) caught a butterfly
(X) laughed so hard you cried
(X) cried so hard you laughed (I actually do this very often when I cry)
( ) cheated on a test (peering yes. I was young then. Not all out cheating)
( ) have a Britney Spears CD
(X) forgotten someone's name
( ) French braided someone's hair (I dont know why I can't do this)
( ) gone skinny dipping in a pool
( ) been threatened to be kicked out of your house
( ) been kicked out your house
(X) have had a fantasy over someone you love as a good friend
( ) sun tanned naked
( ) ran naked in the rain

Short Post. No Time. Going Crazy.

A List of what has been going on:

1. School

2. School

3. School

4. School

5. Best friend accidentally ran over my foot with her SUV. Foot survived. Took it as a sign that a higher power is trying to squeeze the life out of me mentally and physically

6. Went to the big football game against our rival. Lost. It sucks to be on the losing side.

7. Going to see U2 at Madison Square Garden tonight!!! I've seen them once before, but not at a venue like this. I'm so excited. Wahoo!

8. Looking forward to a very happy thanksgiving. And I am thankful for all of you. Have a wonderful day!

I went to a happy hour at the grad school the other day, and I ended up talking with someone who made me think.

This girl was from the Divinity School, and she said, "If you have to struggle to acheive something then it wasn't yours to acheive. You know when you are on the right path because it should come easy. Your talent should be God-sent."

I did not agree with her. As someone who struggles in school, I did not want to. I thought about the many people I know who really struggle to find their path and once they find it, they know they achieve their destiny. I always thought the struggle is a test for you to find how strong your determination is to acheive your goal or find a new one.

What do you think?

I just got a chain email forwarded to me. Nothing to do with luck, life or death, but psychology.

You do a series of simple math problems like 53+22, 12+15...there are about 5-7 of them. At the end is the exclamation, "Now think of a tool and a color!"

98% of people think of a red hammer.

I thought of a blue wrench.

This stupid email never defined us 2% minority, although I have a feeling it explains many of my academic difficulties.

"Won't you be? Please won't you be? Won't you be...my neighbor?"

"Hi neighbor!"

CLS Boy is my neighbor. Well he's not really my neighbor, but he lives 2 suburbian blocks away from me. It is a little strange to drive by his street and see his car there.

I have seen him out of my own free will. We went out to lunch one day, and it was weird. We talked, I set some boundaries, and then he asked me to go to the Pumpkin Festival with him. I became irate, and I couldn't control it. I went off on him saying that the purpose of me going out to lunch with him was not to try again.

I've seen him off and on, so he can pick up some of his stuff and things of that nature. But the strangest part is, the whole time we were dating, he lived about 3.5 hours away from me and the moment we break up, he lives a 3.5 minute walk from me and I've seen him more times in a week than I would in a month.

Its messing with my head.

Especially since I'm talking to someone new.

Just talking.

I'm obsessed with the show MADE on MTV. I love the aspect of the little people winning. Part of it was because mentally I think I was like those people back in the day, although physically I was strong. Now its the other way around.

For those who don't know about this show thats even better than Extreme Home Makeover, each week, the show takes a high school student and transforms them into something they want to be or learn. Examples include girls who have wanted to win a beauty pageant, a football player who wanted to be a ballet dancer, girl who wanted to learn how to wakeboard, etc. The thing is, these kids are viewed as the opposite of what they want to be MADE as. So the girl who wants to win the beauty pageant is notthe standard view of pretty, the wakeboarder does not play any sports, etc. They videotape them over 5 weeks, and the finale is a competition/contest they have to be in, like the wakeboarding competition, a ballet recital, trying out for the cheerleading team.

SO I was thinking about what I would want to be MADE over as. I think it would be a snowboarder. I'm really clumsy and hate the snow and cold, but I love the way they just glide and all the jumps they do. They are really nice athletes, relaxed and fun to be around. Plus, there are a lot of good looking snowboarding men.

This seems like an easy goal, I live near a pseudo-mountain I could try, but when its cold the motivation isnt there.

This lead me to the start of the creation of the 50 things to do before I die list. So far I have learning to play the piano, climbing mt.kilamanjaro, learning how to snowboard, driving cross-country. I'll complete the rest over the weekend.

PS--Can you leave me links of your favorite websites to visit? I'm bored with all of the ones I go to and I'm not sure what I'm looking for.

In light of my newfound singledom, I am reposting an old post I wrote over a year and a half ago....(March 2004)


I am single. (This should come as no surprise to any regular reader of this blog)

It is plainly obvious that I am single. I dont hide it. I also have no significant other to speak of.

Sadly enough, there are people who believe that the lack of my discussion about any significant other in my life from my point of view, means I am hiding someone. Which makes me want to say, "Yes idiot. I have a little iddy biddy someone sitting in the far corner of my back pocket!"

Moving on. These people need an answer as to why I am single. There are 100000 other topics to discuss in life, but the one question that pops out of their mouth is...

"Why are you still single?"

You know what? I dont know. How do you respond to that?

I have figured out different ways to answer this question.

1) I am single, because I am not dating anyone. How's that for luck?

2) Me + Dipshit will eventually equal single anyway.

3) I dont like to share my bed.

4) Because I want to save all the drama for my mama.

5) Boyfriend? No thanks. I'm fabulous enough for two.

6) I know when I'm having a fat day, an ugly day, a crappy day, a bitchy day, a PMS-ridden day, a low serotonin day, or all these days rolled up into one. I dont need a second opinion.

7)If I stay single, someone may adopt me for 10 cents a day. If there are two, the cost goes up.

8)If I dated, I wouldnt be able to take the "Which astrological sign is right for you," the "Are you waiting for Mr.Right to sweep you off your feet," the "Which celebrity is your ideal mate," and lest not forget the "Are you sabotaging your love life" quizzes with the utmost honesty and sincerity.

9) Do you know how hard it is to get TWO tickets for The Lion King?

10) Because I just love hearing this question. Every fucking day.

*********************************************************

CLS Boy is officially moving 2 blocks from me on Saturday. He is going to stop by my place to pick up the rest of his things. I am real nervous about seeing him, I havent talked to him in a while either. Well, thats not true, there was some IM-ing on Monday. But it was kept short. I probably shouldn't sit near him. Should I be hospitable or is that leading him on because I definitely don't want to do that. AARRRGGGHHH. This is why I just eat. It keeps my mind and mouth occupied.

So I'm still in post-break up mode.

Instead of going into detail about that, I'm doing this Meme or whatever they are called...

I stole this from Osbasso

Directions:
Go to Google and click on the images link. Type in the following and post the first (or your favorite) picture the search engine finds.
- The name of the town where you grew up
- The name of the town where you live now
- Your name
- Your Grandmother’s name (pick one)
- Your favorite food
- Your favorite drink
- Your favorite song
- Your favorite smell

The Town Where I Grew Up



The Town Where I Live Now



My Name



My Grandmother's Name



(After seeing this I'm considering asking my Grandmother to dye her hair flaming red. It would go nice with a white sari)


My Favorite Food



My Favorite Drink



My Favorite Song



My Favorite Smells







Interesting posts coming soon...CLS Boy has found an apartment 2 blocks away from mine...stay tuned.

Date of Death of Relationship: 28th September 2005

Estimated Time of Death of Relationship: 9:12pm

Then...

ALL.HELL.BROKE.LOOSE.

He came to my place Tuesday night, and things weren't going so well. Wednesday I was in class all day, and I came home. We ordered a pizza and began talking about the relationship. While we were talking I knew it had to end. At some point I said I didn't want to be together anymore. He asked me to give it another chance, and I said I couldn't. Then he got up from the table and said, "I guess I should go."

I stayed sitting at the table. I didn't know what to do. After 5 minutes I got up to see what was happening. I found him at the entrance of my bedroom leaning against the wall crying uncontrollably. Knowing I had been the cause of his pain, I started crying too. Then I made him sit and he was lying down on the bed, crying and not blinking. He even started twitching. I told him that he couldn't drive tonight and he had to stay. He literally went into a psychotic child-like state repeating over and over that everything will be OK, in a quite child-like voice. I was so scared. I told him he couldn't drive and then he said that there was no way he could stay. He got up and collapsed on his bag just crying. This happened quite a few times. He decided to stay and this morning we went through the same thing. He admitted that things were falling apart with us, although this is the first time he's acknowledged the fact. He was blaming it on distance and I didn't think that was the case. He kept saying, "I'm days away from moving down here." But he's not, and I know it. The hardest part was keeping my ground because I know we were both crying because we had a wonderful relationship in many ways, and for some reason when you break up with someone that's all you can think about. Like right now. He just left. He's taken some of his things and asked me to think about my decision for a couple days. If I feel the same, he will come back for the rest. He said that he will always love me, and we probably cannot be friends, and even if thats true in a relationship, its hard to know that someone will be out of your life forever. Its hard to break up with someone because of drifting apart, or growing in separate directions. Its easier to say, "You were an asshole. Now go." It was so hard to see him leave though, and that he'll probably never be back. And that I've crushed him so much. I feel like an evil person right now. I have to be there for myself now, and I can't immediately call him with a problem or just to tell him something good, or to hear a friendly voice.

I wish it wasn't 2pm right now. Everyone is at work or school and I know all I want is to cry and talk and for someone to tell me I did the right thing. It seemed like the right idea last week. I guess I'll just keep crying til my eyes are a satanic shade of red and I figure everything out. I want him to be happy too.

My leg and pedicured toes.


Did you know today is HNT? Thats right, Half-Nekkid Thursday. Brought to you courtesy of this blog, which was brought to my attention by this blog which I love.

I never thought I would participate in something called Half-Nekkid Thursday. I always thought it would be the kind of thing that I observe intently and with interest, but this time I couldn't resist. I'm a straight arrow looking to make a change. I'm breaking out like Swing Out Sister.

I present to you, My Right Leg. Shaved and lotioned.

I've done it. I jumped on the Friendster bandwagon.

I've actually had an account for quite sometime. When Friendster was popping up everyone barraged me with joining their little friend group. I was too cool and said no, but set up an account anyway just to end the madness.

This was 2 years ago.

Then one fine day, my friend Peanut in New Jersey called me and mentioned how a mutual acquaintance from college found her on Friendster and invited Peanut to her (the acquaintance's) wedding reception. Peanut then went online and saw all of the acquaintance's friends, who were enemies of ours. So Peanut decided she wouldn't go to the reception since all the 'cukooheads' would be there.

I havent heard from these people in ages (nor do I want to). But my nosy self went online to see whats going on. I saw a lot of them that I hope not to see in person. It was mortifying to know that they were in existance. The most interesting part is that they all talked behind their backs in college. I had a great laugh.

Then I found all these people that I LIKE on Friendster, which I guess is the whole point of Friendster. I now have a mere 17 friends. I may not be the most popular girl on Friendster compared to those with 256 friends, but its kind of nice to know where your friends are.

Besides, the whole school is doing it. I'm cool enough for Friendster now.

There's something in the water because this is the 4th wedding I've been to in 5 weeks.

This wedding was in a beautiful convention center place, although poorly planned. There was a 4 hour break between the wedding and the reception, the speeches were kind of crappy (there were almost 10 speeches), the lighting was bad, and desserts were outside the reception hall so once people exited they didn't come back. But the food was excellent.

I'm chilling with my friends. I was at a table where everyone was married except for me. Everyone was great and I loved seeing my friends. We are all over the place, so we usually meet up at weddings now.

Finally, at one point of the wedding there were people with these huge bowlfuls of party favors. One of the women passing out the party favors came to our table. She asked my friend to the right of me if she was married. She said yes. She got her party favor.

She asked me if I was married. I said no. Then she said, "Then you don't get one."

Jaws dropped all around the table. Now you have to be married to get a party favor?!

This woman came around again, and my friend told her that I didn't get one, and this woman said, I know.

I was angry and upset not because I didnt get a stupid cheap 3 Rupee party favor (that is not soley for married couples), but because it was like this God awful thing that I'm not married. I was shunned.

I went and found my Mommy and told her what happened. She was angry too and its fun to be angry with your mom, because she adds an element that can make you laugh. She said that the wedding isn't that great anyway, the gift is cheap, and I look good.

And of course, as always, she was right.

As promised, here are a few pictures from my trip to Greece

Here's Athens. At least one side of it. I'm not entirely sure which side I lived on. I know it was the northeast corner...Its ok, I could always find my way home.


The Parthenon. It was a hot day, so the hike up seemed like forever. Which is why I chose not to pose for pics.

This is taken from the island of Aegina...the water is gorgeous!

The island of Hydra. Yes, all of the islands are so cute.


Mykonos...'nuff said

I'm back!

I've actually been back since August 12th, but I've been trying to cram 2 and a half months worth of summer vacation into 2 and a half weeks. I forgot how many people I haven't seen in so long.

Greece was wonderful. It is such a beautiful country. I worked with women who are victims of sex trafficking and it was so interesting and mentally very rough at the same time. I dont think I will devote my life to the issue, but I think I will always have a foot in it. I am getting involved with an organization here which works with victims, so hopefully I can learn more and maybe my experiences can help.

Aside from that, I did get to travel a lot. I lived just outside Athens, went to Sounion, the islands of Aegina, Hydra and Mykonos. Took a road trip to Marathon, Delphi, Olympia and through the Peloponese to Nafplio and Corinth. I think I experienced everything there is to experience, even eating Grilled Octopus which is a major delicacy over there. (It wasnt so for me) I tried to immerse myself in the culture as much as I could, I picked up a little Greek, and joined the gym there. I really had an amazing 2 months.

The only downsides were 1) I was stuck with the girliest roommates in the world. To the point that there was a couple times we went out together, they walked around the club trying to pick up guys instead of enjoying the company they were with. Things ended on a sour note and I'm thankful I dont have to see them again. and 2) All of the other Indians there were vendors and people of that sort which was discouraging to see from my point of view.

Anyway, I am home now, just started my first day of class and I all I want is 1 more week off. I think I deserve it. We have classes on Labor Day.

Hello from Greece! I figured I should blog only after seeing the Acropolis, which I did today.

This will be a short post, but all is well and beautiful here in Greece. Work is amazing...a little depressing since I'm working on a sad subject, but I'm learning so much.

Greece is beautiful.People are friendly, and there is a lot of life here. People are always out and about. I went out out for the first time last night. Left at midnight and got back in at 5am. Thats how it goes here.

Its so nice to be away from the stress that I call home. Its amazing how I feel.

Hope everyone is well!

You know what I like about Europe? At least in Holland, they have 4 music television channels, and they all play videos. A few shows, but mainly videos. Old, new, and they play them at full length.

How's that for a concept?

Thank you for listening to my rant about children. I really do love them, but this one is insane.

Amsterdam is great. Its such a nice place. I went to a cafe called 'The Doors' looking for the good stuff. I saw the pot, and that was wild. I kept looking around for the cops to rush in, and then I had to remind myself that 'Its ok! I'm in the real land of the free!'

Dutch people are very nice. They aren't Euro-stylish, but stylish and casual. Lots of people wear sneakers and jeans, but they are funky, colorful sneakers, and not running sneakers and jeans. Its odd being in a land where Indians are a true minority in every sense of the word. Not just Indians, but those who are not tall and blonde. One thing, the Dutch are lovely people who ride their bikes everywhere.

One thing I love to do with any vacation is to see the sights, but to get a feel as to how people live. What does the supermarket look like, basically what do the regular people do on a daily basis? Staying with my cousin has given me the chance to do that. I've been to the grocery store, visited the playschool, went to the regular shopping mall, taken the bus...things like that.

Amsterdam is a small city which doesn't take long to see. I think if I was in my early 20's, and didn't have family here, I would stay 5 days for all the partying, etc. Its easy to get around.

I went to Austria by train last weekend. Myself and 2 of my friends met up at one friends house. (1 friend is from Holland, and 1 is from Austria)...we went to this small town on top of a mountain 20 minutes past Salzburg. It was gorgeous. The mountains are amazing, and there are so many churches and beautiful houses built all around the area. All I could think of was the Sound of Music. Thankfully, my Dutch friend thought the same. We didn't do much and that was perfect. Spent time by the lake, went sailing, played a game, had dinner at my friends boyfriend's place with his family, who were very nice. Although my German is very minimal, so there was a bit of a communication gap. The best part were the young kids trying to practice their English talking about a show called, 'Pimp Up My Ride.' I know the show is called 'Pimp My Ride', but they all say, 'Pimp Up My Ride.' The kids love it, and they were imitating the way X-ibit talks. Let me tell you, if you want to see comedy in its purest form, check out some young Austrian kids trying to speak Ebonics. You'll fall off your chair.

A little background, my friend from Holland, Austria and I worked together in New York, and thats how we know each other. We used to hang out all the time. We haven't seen each other in 2.5 years. I'm surprised they haven't met up either since they are in Europe. So it was just wonderful.

We would eat breakfast outside...butter here is great, and I love a typical German breakfast.

So anyway, Sunday, my Holland friend and her husband went back to Holland, and I went with my friend to Innsbruck where she works. This time, we were at the bottom of the mountain, where you'll find an Ikea, H&M, etc. Not how I pictured Innsbruck, but it is still beautiful. Along the way, we stopped at another lake outside Munich and I had a typical Bavarian meal, which consisted of a lot of meat.

Monday morning I left Innsbruck by train, and went on a crazy train ride which took me all along the Rhine, to Cologne, and finally finally finally, back to Amsterdam.

I went to 3 countries in 3 days. I'm currently 2 hours from Belgium and 4 hours from Paris. Its so strange to say that, because I'm 8 hours from Canada, and 30-something hours from Mexico. I guess that's Europe.

One very good thing that has happened since I came is that the dollar has gained an ounce of strength against the Euro. I'm hoping for more!

Today is my last full day in the United States, and it went like an episode of The Real World.

I woke up stressed at 6am, 7am, 8am, and finally 8:45am. I chatted with Roomie and then putzed around. Mainly pacing until it came time for her to leave. So she was going to work, we hugged, and had watery eyes. She left before crying, and I went to my room and cried. I think of her when I think of home, but when I come back it wont be like that. I stopped crying and stressed out again. I got myself and my things together, and had to leave him. Cried some more. I know, its only two months and I'm crying over everything but a lot of it is stress, and a lot of it is change itself.

Then I had to get on to other duties that were not mine. Picking up my niece, seeing my uncle, and just doing things for everyone else when today really needed to be a ME day. I'm almost done packing, I think. Luckily I'll be in Greece, so if there is anything I really need I'm sure I can get it. Plus, my airline allows 2 bags.

I'll try and blog when I can. I've been reading everyone's blogs, but just not commenting, and I'm sorry about that. Just want to let you know that I am thinking of you.

First stop--Amsterdam...where's the good stuff because I need some!

I have been so busy with Greece preparations. Every so often I have to remind myself that its not a trip, I'll be living and working there for 2 months. I don't know what I need, so I have basically decided to fit everything in a suitcase and a half, including a box of Grape Nuts Cereal. Gotta have my fiber.

This weekend my roomie and I had a ladies night where we invited our friends (without their men) to our place. They were mainly her friends who I know since most of my friends were busy. It was fun, we got pizza, made drinks, and a pampered chef demonstration, and talked about everything from childhood to men to life as old ladies. Afterwards, we went to a club for a couple hours, and that night we realized why we go out once a year. Some of the people there are crazy. My poor eyes.

5 people slept over, so the only 2 rooms in our apartment where there wasnt a body on the floor was the kitchen and the bathroom. It was real nice. We then went out for brunch, came home and everyone left.

Then it was roomie and I. After everyone left, we were kind of sad, especially because this is our last week of living together. I leave for Europe next week, and by the time I come back she will be all moved out and on to her new endeavor. My new roomie moves in a couple weeks after that. So we took a walk with some bread looking for some ducks to feed, but couldn't find any. Then we came home and hung out. Its funny, because even though we've been living together for almost a year, the last few months I've been so busy with school, I haven't really been able to give all of myself to anyone. So hanging out with her was nicer. We were both sad. This last week I have to see everyone, and spend quality time with my family, CLS Boy, Roomie, and my best friend. I do get sad thinking that Roomie won't be here when I get back. She has been a great roomie and friend, we didn't fight once, and laughed all the time. We had moments of course, but we are both smart enough to know when to stay away from each other. I've gained a friend for life, and that is a very sunny brightside.

One thing I am learning from the preparations of going to Greece, is that travelling is a big part of who I am. I love travelling, new cultures, and learning about people, and helping them. Its all me. I need this in my life. But I also need stability. I can't wait for my last year of school to end so I can finally have that.

Of course when school ends next year and we all leave to wherever we were lucky enough to find jobs, I'll probably wish I lived in the same neighborhood as all of my friends.

Last Sunday, I bought an 8 pack of snack size Hershey Milk Chocolate Bars. I finished the pack this Sunday.

It took me 7 days to finish 8 SNACK SIZE Hershey Milk Chocolate Bars instead of 7 minutes.

Can I have some thunderous applause please?

A couple nights ago I went to a concert where Rahzel, The Shins, and O.A.R. all performed. It was a great concert in the outdoors.

The one thing which greatly disturbed me was the amount of people on the cell phones. There were a great many people who were with their friends, and on the phone looking for their other friends, and trying to find out what they were doing after the concert, while the concert was going on.

I equated this phenomena with the slow demise of human relationships due to the increased reliance of technology, most importantly the cell phone. I know it sounds like I'm going overboard. There really is no point in going out with a bunch of friends, then spending half your time looking for the other friends or finding out what the other group is doing. Sure, one can do this, but why go to a concert with friends, since both entities require a moderate amount of attention, and instead devote all of your attention to a cell phone texting or calling someone else.

Of course nowadays, most people have accepted this from their friends. And yes, sometimes the phone rings when you're out with other people, and I'm all for the don't answer it policy, or pick it up, see whats going on, and let them know you have someone in your physical presence who you are trying to spend quality time with, and who is not using up all of your minutes. If anyone's phone rings when someone is with me and they choose to carry on with the chit-chat (which I can only assume is chit chat because the part of the conversation I hear is..."Hey!...Not much, just sitting at a cafe with Dr.P...no, but I need to go shopping...You are? We should go sometime!" At the end of about 3 minutes of this, I feel I should note the date when my friend is going out with their other friend so I can call and maybe she will talk to me some more. Instead, I always mention, "If you want, we can end early and you can call your friend back." or if I'm real irritated, "Maybe I should just call you so I can get a chance to talk to you."

I'm glad I own my cell phone and my phone doesn't own me. And the emergence of the Blackberry? Don't even get me started.

Pua and I have the same biorhythm. Right now I'm so overwhelmed with my life I don't know whats going on. Took a fun trip to the doctor and found out I have low iron, low calcium, mildly high glucose and borderline high cholesterol. I'll have you know that I exercise, drink milk and take a vitamin with Calcium everyday. Meanwhile, my 200 pound brother, who does not exercise and eats crap is fit as a fiddle. God is messing with me, I just know it.

ITs the end of the semester and I have many assignments due, I don't know where to start, and I just want to sleep. Tomorrow I'm running/walking a 5k to raise some money for various education projects.

Because of all the assignments, I've put blogging on the back burner. I'm tired of looking at the computer screen. I want to be in the sun.

So to get my dose of sun, I go and visit my niece who is currently staying with my parents. She has a new bike, and she's addicted to the little bell. She makes me laugh with her squishy mushy little face.

...I actually started this post yesterday, and as I re-read my post I have no idea where I was going with it. I think I had a plan yesterday, and today its missing. Sounds like the same thing that happened to my sanity.

SOmetimes I get so conusmed with school, I forget about the finer things.

My friend stopped by to hang out, and then she told me to come out to dinner with her and my best friend. At first I said no, she lightly twisted my arm, and I thought, "Well, a meal I dont have to cook is a great meal by me." Off I went.

I forgot how close the 3 of us are. It sounds silly, but I havent really talked to anyone lately...although I must have because my cell phone bill is through the roof. But it hasnt been talking just updating. This was a girls night.

We sat and talked and talked even long after our meal was over. I forgot how well my friends knew me. They could sense so much. When I came home 4 hours later, I was so happy, and part of me just wanted to cry since I think I released a lot of stress.

Life is ok, work work work...and I booked my ticket to Greece!

I love Tuesdays since I dont go to my 8am class.

On Saturday, Roomie and I went to her sisters bachelorette party. We threw the tamest bachelorette party ever (at her sisters request).
So first we went to Roomie's parents house to see Mommy and Daddy Roomie. Then we drove through Rhode Island, which was a first for me. (It didnt take long)...I saw the Famous Big Blue Bug in Providence!

Big Blue Bug! (I tried to upload it as an image but my computer is blocking the window I need to use!)

After the excitement of the Big Blue Bug, we ended up in Peabody. The theme was a pretty pretty princess party. So we made all pink drinks, had pink princessy napkins, pink plates, pink goodie bags...This was fun.

The decorations were pink and white crepe paper, pink balloons, and our peau de resistance was the centerpiece...a bottle of Absolut Vodka with penis straws inside. (Kind of like a vase of flowers...)

Bride-to-be had to wear her Bride to Be sash which lit up and her tiara. No getting around that.

We had a manicurist and facialist come to the house, which was great. My nails look great, and the facialist said while she was doing my face that I had a very good presence. Like I was a good person. I thought that was sweet.

Then, the ultimate entertainment...the sex toy party!

A woman came and showed us different sex toys, and this was news to me! I actually saw the Rabbit (if you watch Sex and the City, you know what I mean)...I tested it...on my nose! heh heh...there are all things lickable, rubbable and insertable. Hell, there was even something called "Wally" which stuck on the wall...There was a vibrator called the Bullet which had 7 speeds. I may not have a lot of experience here, but what man or woman has 7 speeds?! SEVEN!!! No wonder there are a lot of sexually unsatisfied people out there.

Unfortunately, my facial was scheduled halfway through the sex toy party so I missed some of it. My roomie felt bad and bought me something special from the sex toy lady. I have no idea what it is.

We had food and stuff too, and my nails look great.

I hosted my first party the other day. It was a potluck and a bunch of my friends came by. It turned out to be pretty fun. I was nervous, as I always am before hosting things (I tend to throw parties for friends birthdays). I even cooked something.

For whatever reason, my parties tend to turn silly. There was a little wine involved, but not that much. Grown men and women talking about strategically placing a fart machine near our stats professor so it goes of intermittantly during class, playing soccer with a balloon, and making a hat out of newspaper.

In other exciting news, I used "Evites" to send out invites to another party. This one is at my parents house, and my mom is making Indian food for everyone. It should be great. I'm such a dork, I love checking the evites to see if I got responses. Im addicted to my evite. I love writing my own form of "Yes" (Right on!), "Maybe" (Decisions, Decisions), and "No" (Bummer.) I want to invite people to something (or nothing) just so I can have the joy of designing a lovely evite, and checking for responses.

I'll be out soon.

I can't take the enormity of Christianity that is on the news day in and day out.

There I said it. It may sound awful, but thats just how I feel.

I like religion of all types. I have friends who have brought me into the worlds of Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Atheism and many subtexts of these. I think religion helps many people retrieve a sense of peace and hope when they feel like there is none. I don't like people selling their religion to me, telling me why I should believe one way or another. If my heart takes me one way or another, then that way I shall go.

It seems like everyone is consulting The Bible to make decisions. Concerning Terri Schiavo, I do understand it, since people are divided by science and morals. (I think there is a diplomatic way to handle this, but I'm sure for some legal reason, its not possible) But I just read an article about a man in Colorado who was served the death penalty, and had his sentence switched to life in prison since jurors consulted the Bible during deliberations. The Governor of Colorado and the prosecution saw no problem with this.

Did someone throw out the Constitution? Didn't many people come here from England for the separation of Church and State? We are seeing the effects of the combination of Church and State.

I suppose the part that angers me is the question of, "What if that were me?"

If I were Terri Schiavo, would people be rallying to make sure I get fed, or would I be considered destined to hell since I am not a Christian? And would this same line of thought be valid in other situations where others would be required to decide my fate in some way?

I hope not.

2 great things.

1) Monday, after doing double time on the phone and the computer, I got U2 tickets!! I'll be in the nosebleed seats at Madison Square Garden in November!! I think we are higher than the scoreboard!! I can't wait!

2) I will be spending 10 weeks of my summer in Athens, Greece (as opposed to Athens, Georgia) for my internship. I'll be working on some sort of Health and Policy development to protect women from ending up in a sex trafficking ring that is going on in Europe, in collaboration with the World Health Organization.

No wait, one more thing...

3) It was a beautiful spring day today.

I feel like I should break something myself before the streak gets too good.

ARGH!

That is all I have to say.

I am a victim of Tremendous effort leading to bad luck.

U2 tickets went on sale this weekend. Now I have never been physically present to ever buy concert tickets, so I wasnt sure what to expect. Last time I found out they were touring (I saw them during the Elevation tour), I was in India, and I emailed my friends to see if they could get tickets. Sure enough, one did.

Moving on...

Tickets went on sale at 10am, Tasha and myself headed over to our nearest Ticketmaster location around 8:30. We find out that there is a lottery for buying tickets. This means, they hand you a raffle ticket with your number on it, and this little ticket basically decides your fate. I had no idea this was how it was done, but ok, now I know.

We were standing in line, in a row, since we figured lottery meant they draw all the tickets and thats how we form the line.

Here is the dictionary.com definition of lottery.

Did you notice the word RANDOM in that definition? I did.

When this so-called 'lottery' time came up, the manager of the store picked ONE number (not so lucky for me, it was the ticket for the last people in line, and we were one of the first), and started lining up people in a sequental order. The last number was ticket number 590006, and the next person in line was 590007.

This went on until the latter numbers were done, and then he began lining up the earlier numbers. What was my number? 589089.

Needless to say, the latter half of the line was in an outrage, trying to tell him the definition of lottery. If I knew that was his definition of lottery, I would have had one of us stand in the back.

We knew we weren't going to get tickets, and we tried calling ticketmaster to no avail, and tickets were sold out in 30 minutes. The reason why it took so long? Jimmy Buffet tickets were on sale at the same time, so people were snatching those up too.

I was bummed, because I felt like I got robbed. If the "Lottery" was the way I assumed lottery to be, I would have felt a little better if my particular ticket was chosen last. But no. My fate was in someone else's hands.

I know there are many worse things in life than this (like Gonzaga losing to Texas Tech yesterday in the NCAA basketball tournament), and I know my life will go on, but I hate it when my fate rests in others hands. ARGH!

Allow me to introduce another excerpt of "Conversations with Mom"

The Setting: Mom and I are driving back from seeing my brother. I'm driving, mom is in passengers seat, radio is on.

Radio: "Big Pimpin' spendin' cheese..."

Mom: "What is he saying? Spending cheese? What does that mean?"

Me: "He's spending a lot of money."

Mom: "That is stupid. Why doesnt he simply use the word Money? Whats this cheese? Sounds so stupid."

Me: "Its ok."

Radio: "..Jigga man..."

Mom: "What?! Jiggle Man? Is he fat?"

Me: "No Ma, he's not."

Mom: "He just said he was."

Me: *Promptly changes the station to the LITE station*

A lot of my friends have been through many milestones which I havent reached yet, and I always cheer them on.

Then, along comes that one friend who I thought would be behind the times like myself, who reaches a milestone I'm not close to.

This weekend I had 2 of those friends reach milestones. One got engaged, and one had her baby shower.

The baby shower was nice, although I was the only one who was neither married, or with child. Even the girls who I went to high school with were talking about teething and day care, and the older mom's on the other side of me were talking about grandchildren. I felt a little out of place. Then I received the Yahoo photo album for the shower, where there's a picture of me at the corner of tables grandmother and new mothers with the caption, "You'll be at the mommy table soon Dr.P!"...glad to know that was sent to all her family and friends *sarcasm*.

So after seeing way too much pink for one day, I went to my parents house where they proceeded to tell me that they would like to being their process of moving back to India by December. So by the time I graduate in May 2006, they'll be done too. I know they want to go...they've spent more time in this country away from their mothers and siblings, and they've done all they need to do here, so they deserve not to be tied down by us (Me). Knowing that my stable home will not be ours anymore is a little saddening. I like knowing my parents are at least in the same time zone as I am. My friends have said I can go visit their parents if I need some parenting. heh heh.

So I've been reassessing. Where I am, where I am going to, and what will become of me. To be honest, I havent come up with any answers, and I think I have to get used to that.

Since I wasnt able to go to my old job on a regular basis, I had to get a new job. (Meaning=I got fired)

My new job will inspire you.

Have you ever wondered what Universities do with all the applications they receive once they are done with them?

They save them in a dingy basement somewhere in the depths of the school. Now that everything is becoming computerized, they have to somehow put all of these applications online.

This is where I come in. I get to remove the staples from the application, place them in a specific order with each applicant's specific identifying bar code on top, so the school can scan the information.

Although there is an interesting perk...I read some of the applications. There are a LOT of intelligent people out there who have done some amazing things.

I know. I never thought my skills would ever be put to use.

I had a HUGE 'first' on Saturday.

HUGE!

GI-NORMOUS!

With CLS Boy and one of my dear friends as witness.

I still can't believe I did it....

What did I do, you ask?....I held a cat for the first time.

Don't worry. I'm ok.

I am not an animal person by any means. I love doggies and cute animals, but I don't ever want to be a pet owner. I like to travel, and I wouldn't feel right leaving them alone. I also do not know how to groom an animal. And my mother has instilled in me that pets=cleaning=extra work=me not taking good care of pet.

I've never been around animals much. My friends have lovely little creatures as pets, but as they were/are not mine, I have no reason to pick them up. I love giving them treats and petting them, but thats as far as our relationship would go.

CLS Boy loves cats. My friend loves cats. I've never picked one up, so my friend told me to try on her cute little 18-pounder cat. I didnt know what to do. I did not want to pick up the cat in the wrong way so she'll flail her paws about, and possibly try to scratch my eyes out everytime I visit. I didn't want to dislocate her tail or leg.

I was still nervous to pick her up. So I put on my nice, padded winter gloves to protect myself. After being berated by my friend and CLS Boy, I took off the gloves and CLS Boy semi-picked her up and I tried to move my hands in a position that would not harm my friends cat. Somehow the cat was placed in my arms. Since the cat was an 18-pounder, I had to sit immediately.

Everyone was proud of my accomplishment, and we even took a picture to commemorate the moment. I was happy to hold the cat (especially since she didn't hiss, bite or scratch me), although I'm still trying to get the cat hairs off my jacket.

Since I've had the joy of being in a knocked-out kind of sickness state for 2 weeks (therefore not leading much of a life), I've been able to watch lots of tv. I've decided to talk about a show I HATE and a show I like.

New Show to Hate:

Theres a new show on VH-1 dealing with race and lust. Its mainly talking about biracial celebrities, and interracial couples in movies and real life. This is right up my alley. I love to see how other people deal with their situations.

Sadly, the show was about peoples opinion on these things. Some people were like, Why cant they stick to their own race?-type thing, and there were a lot of insults directed toward whites. I hate this because racism is racism no matter what race someone is. Just because 'whites' are the majority, I dont think its right or fair to sit and be racist to someone. There was even a comment on how Halle Berry 'used' to have black costars before she became this big star, and now she works with white costars. They were talking about how biracial people are confused. They even had a segment on "Who's more Latina, Cameron Diaz or Christina Aguilera?" The kicker: The segment on how do Asians/Latinos love, how do Black/White love, etc. Maybe it was supposed to be informational, but I thought the whole program was downright racist. It was such a negative show, I couldnt believe it was on. Yes, I did watch it. I was hoping for some change in attitude or lesson to be learned. Didnt get that, so now Im appalled.

Awesome show (which is not so new):

I'm hooked to MADE on MTV. This is a show where a high school kid writes in wanting to be "Made" into some type of person (usually the opposite of what they are at that moment). So a girly girl will want to learn to race dirt bikes BMX style, a girl who sings classical music will want to learn hip hop dance to try out for the hip hop dance squad at their school, etc. They track the journey until the tryouts/big event, and see how they change.

The best best BEST one I saw was about this kid named Dov. He is very smart (nerd in high school terms), into dance and theatre, and bullied all the time. He wanted to be "Made" into a wrestler and try out for his high school team. He was so cute and sweet, and I didnt understand why he hardly had any friends. He said how bullying got so bad for him in one school that he had to switch, but unfortunately the same thing happened at this school. The cool thing was, Kurt Angle (big burly wrestler) visited Dov at school and confronted his bully, and the bully was crapping in his pants. Anyway, Dov got all this training, got confident, got the nice girl to go to the dance with him and made it on the wrestling team. It was just so sweet.

I love it when nice guys and gals finish FIRST. Thats how life should be.

I actually had a restful weekend.

Since the NHL is being uncooperative and finding reasons NOT to give me a hockey season this year, I got my fix by going to a school game and bringing a friend along with me.

My school's hockey team is pretty awful. The funny thing is, I've never been on a losing team before. I've lost before, but never where the amount of losses exceeded my wins. (This is only in reference to athletics) SO it was kind of crappy when my school didnt score ONE goal.

Saturday, my re-sickened self went over to my parents house. I ended up going to see one of my friends who came down from Boston, and we went to see Hitch. It was funny, but the end got all sappy wappy, and I wasnt prepared for that.

Sunday, hung around my parents some more. Found out they are going to Florida for 5 days. I hope they have fun, I wish they were taking me. I hope to get a cool souvenier out of this trip though. Their last trip, when they went to the Bahamas, I got a $2 (Mom left the price tag on) bright orange t-shirt, that went down to my knees, had tropical flowers on it, with "Bahamas" smeared across the front. It was hideous.

Today I saw a wonderful speaker at school. Paul Rusesabagina. If this name is not familiar to you, you have not seen Hotel Rwanda like I told you to. It was amazing hearing him speak. You could feel the emotion from living through a genocide. Can you believe that 9000 people were killed/day? I cant believe there were governments who could sleep at night knowing this information.


Thats about all the update from here. Its now time for me to take cold and sinus meds. Cant wait for the summer, and this semester to be OVER.

Blatantly stolen from Robert

Choose a band/artist and answer only in song TITLES by that band: U2

Are you male or female:
The Sweetest Thing

Describe yourself:
Two Shots of Happy, One Shot of Sad

How do some people feel about you:
She's a mystery to me

How do you feel about yourself:
Out of Control

Describe your ex girlfriend/boyfriend:
MOFO

Describe your current girlfriend/boyfriend:
Wild Honey

Describe where you want to be:
Where the Streets Have No Name or New York

Describe what you want to be:
Even Better than the Real Thing

Describe how you live:
Love and Peace or Else

Describe how you love:
Deep in the Heart

Share a few words of wisdom:
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

I'm sick. On Valentines Day. How appropriate.

Since I didnt go to class, I can now blog. So there are some benefits here. Although I wish I had some sort of talent. I have so many crafty friends around my area, and in the blog world. Pua knits beautifully, and lest not forget all the wonderful bloggers who can add a personal touch to their blogs...computer graphic artists if you will.

I have friends here who make beautiful scrapbooks, skirting for tables, clothes, pictures, candles...loads of things. I wish I had that kind of talent. Or maybe the patience to use that kind of talent. At least I could create something beautiful instead of cooling my fevered head on the cool window. (I'm taking a holistic approach to medicine today)

Actually, if I could do anything artsy, I'd love to know how to play the piano. I could conceivably learn, so maybe I will someday.

A few comments before the actual post:

*Its Chinese New Year, and my Chinese friends have amused me by wishing me "Happy Chinese New Year, its the year of the Cock!"

*I ran into cute TA again on a day I decided to mismatch my outfit since I was running late for class.

*I went to the store to pick up a V-Day card for CLS Boy, and all the cards made me physically ill.

Anyway...

Someone once told me that many of the qualities one dislikes in other people, they have themselves. Ok, Im pretty sure I heard it on Oprah. BUT! I never thought about it, until there were some personality pet peeves that I do not like in others, which I found in myself. So yes, sadly, I'm flawed.

When I notice what I'm doing, I try to correct myself.

Its always silently enjoyable to notice others doing the same thing I've done: complain about flaws in others without realizing they may have the exact same flaw.

My recent enjoyment came from one of my friends, C. She tends to talk about how awful it is when people are judgemental, when she is quite judgemental herself. She also HATES it when people who have attended Ivy League or other high ranked colleges, name drop their university into conversation, talk intelligently using their SAT/GRE vocab words, and look at her in disdain when she mentions the college she went to. (Which is a good school) I understand her pain. When this happens to me, I just let these people be. ALthough I completely agree with her if someone acts like other colleges are nothing compared to their school.

I'm quite happy with the university I'm attending. C and I work at the same place which is affiliated with the University I attend. I mentioned to C that one of my friends is applying for a Post-Bac program at Harvard. Somehow, the conversation ended up with C going on about all the things wrong with my school, and all the things right with Harvard. (she's taken a few classes at Harvard)

To be honest, I dont know the intricacies about my school. I'm just happy I'm going. I dont know if one school is truly better than the other, because I believe it is all subjective. There are many wonderful schools out there that offer so many programs and have students working all over the world.

So I was quite amused with the way she was talking. I let her go on. I knew she felt comfortable going on since she got into a Ph.D program (not at Harvard) a couple days ago, so she has been feeling extra confident these days, and a little competitive with me. (Even though Im going for a masters in a different field)

She ended it with, "So thats why I'll always be a Harvard girl."

With that I smiled for a minute. Then erupted in laughter.

I didnt tell her why I was laughing. I didnt think it was anything to debate over, its not something i care about. She didnt ask why I was laughing.. She changed the subject really quick.

Did I mention she's going to study Psychology?...ahhh...I love observing people too.

I got one of the highest compliments today.

At precicely 3:17pm, my friend called me the Goddess of Cynicism!

YES!!

I want my tiara and sash NOW.

It all started with the whole Valentines Day Shmalentines Day talk. I mentioned how its just another form of commercialism by wrapping up every single candy in red and silvery paper and reselling it. Its another holiday for 'loved ones' to rush down to Hallmark, by some card, pick up some flowers, and toss out the receipt on the way home.

I saw the movie Hotel Rwanda recently (go see it). Everyone knew about the genocide, and no one did anything to stop it. Instead they told the world that they are working on it, and a couple people did some good things for a couple people, but the majority were neglected.

Valentines day is similar. Everyone knows about it. There are some people who will do sweet things for their significant other. The majority of people will be part of the neglected bunch or the last minute I-better-buy-something-to-NOT-get-in-trouble gift. But it sounds better to buy something than to say the holiday is full of shit.

I dont need another bear holding a heart. I dont need more chocolate. (wait, thats not true) I dont need someone to rush around to 'celebrate' our love on one specific day since thats what the media is forcing us to do.

You know what would be special for me? Hanging out on Valentines Day and saving the something special for the day after, or a couple weekends after. I want to have our own day and share it because we want to, and not because the world says so.

Why boyfriends have wanted to stay with me, I'll never know.

BIG NEWS.*

I know someone on a reality tv show!

Dont you want to be my friend now?*

I like some reality tv, although Im sick of it since there is no originality in tv anymore. Luckily the girl I know is on a show I can stand. The girl I know is not really I girl I know NOW. Or Anymore. I used to babysit her, and her family still lives near my parents family. So you see the tight* connection going on here.

With all the reality tv going on these days its easy to find someone who has the same tight* connection to the reality tv person as I have with mine. The funny thing is, it kind of makes you want to watch the show even more. My thought was a, "Hey I used to know you! What is someone from my town up to?"

So, yes, every once in a while I mention that I know this reality tv person. Some people respond with, "Really?!" And its so hard to be all casual and cool when you know someone on reality tv.* Used to know someone who is on reality tv now. Ok, havent had a real conversation with them since you stopped babysitting them, although the family still lives down the street from you. Although its useless to talk about if someone doesnt even watch the show at all.

She got eliminated though.

So I move on to bragging about the other famous person I once used to know years ago...someone on Dawson's Creek.

Oh yeah, you so want to be my friend now.*

All the *s in this post denote a huge amount of sarcasm.

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I currently go to school in a small city. It revolves around 3 colleges, and there are things to do, but you just have to find them. Its not like NYC where all you have to do is wake up and you'll find something interesting.

I have lived 20 minutes away from this small city for the majority of my life. Life has always been how it is.

Now being in grad school, surrounded by people who went to school in such places as Boston, Chicago, Philly, Richmond, and Taipei, people turn to me to vent about the small city.

"What is there to do here?"

"Is there anything to do here?"

"Everytime I go out in this city, I miss Philly more and more."

"How have you lived here for so long? You must like it."

"The weather sucks here. The shopping sucks. Everything sucks. Its so boring."

I did not build this city. Jefferson Starship did.

I never know how to respond to the complaints. Im not the town mayor. I go around, I find things to do. At the same time, it doesnt take much to entertain me. Most people in my class are between the ages of 23-26. While I still love to go out, going out with the youngin's is a little different. They're always looking for more. The school provides activities, but the students in my class seem bored by them. I dont understand how they feel because I have different things to do on a daily basis.

I think they could try more to make the best of what's around. It is hard to come here when you've been in a big city for 4 years, or your whole life. I cant help them either. My idea of fun has changed a lot in a couple years. So I know the age difference wont help them in finding the fun they desire.

Im sure when graduation rolls around, there will be a collective sigh of relief when they receive their diplomas and book their plane tickets.

People do and say some crazy things while drunk. But I think a good rule of thumb is not to drink if you're depressed or if you've recently ended a relationship.

Roomie broke up with her boyfriend of 4 years recently. She tried to maintain a friendship, but alas, it wasnt meant to be.

She opens her inbox and sees an email written from him at 4:00am.

The second line of the email was, "I masturbate and think of you." (Too much information post break-up!!)

Other grand lines included in this email were, "I really, really like you." (after 4 years?! Where is the Black Eyed Peas Love?!) and "You're one fit bird."

He wrote a follow up email apologizing for his email, which was just as bad as the original.

God help the drunks. (Including me in my moments)

Hidey Ho Blogger!

Im a bore these days. I had my first week of class, and its going. I think Im reeling from one of the grades from my class last semester. I could have done better, and I HATE it when my best isnt good enough.

A lot of life changing things happen to people around the early part of the New Year. Today alone I found out that 2 of my cousins (in India) wives are pregnant and due in a few months (somehow they didnt notify me!), one of my good friends in my class got engaged, and Im talking to a friend in India just got engaged.

These are times I wonder if Im just schlepping through my days. I've been thinking that a lot of my good friends who were born in 1975 and have birthdays this year will be turning 30. That sounds so adult. I dont feel like one though. I feel like me, and that Im a youngblood, and young-at-heart.

This is probably because I think about moving away after school. I've never lived in a place without some sort of friend or family member in the area. I would like to move to DC where there are a lot of job opportunities in my field, which would mean I would be over 6 hours away from home, my parents who are getting older, my niece who is getting bigger, and a whole lot of friends who will also move on with life.

This is all inevitable. But its hard to think about how a dream can take you away from the people who supported your journey all the way through.

Today is the start of a new semester. Crikey!

Although yesterday I had a bum day.

On Saturday, my mom asked me to go shopping with her on Sunday. I was really looking forward to this since we havent done any mother/daughter events in a very long time. She told me that she had to go somewhere in the morning, but to come to their place at 2pm.

So I got to the 'rents house at 2pm sharp. Waited. Saw all the bad tv there is to see, and settled on a movie on the Indian station to brush up some language skills. 3 rolled around, and no mommy. So I made myself lunch. She calls at 3:15 saying she'll be home in an hour. 4:45pm came, and I decided to leave. Just as I was pulling out, she was pulling in, so instead of going home, I went to the drugstore to buy some notebooks. I came home, and one of my aunt's was with her. My mom took an out of state trip and thought she's be back by 2. Then she told me she had to drop of Aunty back at her place, and I was invited there for dinner. I was pretty upset and said, "You said you would be home by 2, and I've been waiting for 3 hours!"

With that I stormed upstairs, like any angry child would do.

I went to the bathroom and when I came out Mom was standing there. She asked me if I was really mad, and I said yes. Then she gave me a hug and apologized and said we would go another day. She made me a quick dinner and then left.

Even though I knew she genuinely felt sorry, I was still pretty upset, I guess I didnt realize how much I was looking forward to an afternoon with my mom. After a short cry in the car, I stopped at the video store to pick up a movie I've been waiting to see: Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. I needed a laugh.

I've heard rave reviews about this movie. I have to say, parts of it were good, but as a whole, I didn't really like it. So that was no good.

Then at night, I was on the phone with CLS Boy. He sent me some pics of our trip to Burlington, and there is one of me that I HATE. I asked him to delete it. It was really cold, its a close up of my face, and I have a God-awful expression. All I asked him was, "Can you delete that picture? I hate it!" Then he said, "You're just wearing a bulky coat, you're not fat." My response, "Uh, I didnt think I looked fat, I hate my expression. But thanks."

After that, my very sick roomie and I watched an awful show on Vh1 called the Surreal Life. We thought it was awful until we saw Marcus Schenkenberg wearing only boxers. No shirt. No socks. Just boxers and his hot body.

And I found my silver lining for the day.