Monday, August 09, 2004

I hate going to the doctors office. It sucks. I hate health care in this country too. You pay money when you're well to have them tell you that you cant be covered when you're NOT well. (unless of course, you shell out more money. Even if you do this, they'll drop you because you're "using" too much of their money. Like Im using my insurance money to vamp up my wardrobe)

My insurance expired a little while ago. Even though Im still working, there were some things going on and 3 weeks ago I became a part timer. I finish work in 4 days. My first day of orientation for grad school is on the 26th. On the 26th I will get some more insurance. The crappy part is that I can only go to the doctors affiliated with the University (where I work, and will eventually go to school), and I know some of these docs. I can imagine...I'll have to undress and we can never look at each other again. Augh! NO!

I havent been feeling well, and its very uncharacteristic of me. Not just a runny nose type of thing, but some constant aches and pains, which have started concerning me as of recent. I NEVER go to the doctor. I will work while I'm sick just to prove that Im not sick (although everyone knows IM sick. I just hate being inactive).

I went to a family friend who is a doctor. It pays to be Indian sometimes. You're never short of "off the record" health care. So I discussed my problem, and he was slightly concerned. Although he told my parents there is nothing to be concerned about. Which confuses me, because he went through the spectrum of "Its nothing" to "It could be a chronic, debilitating condition." Yeah, thanks buddy.

Since he told my parents that its nothing serious, my parents want me to wait 2 weeks until I get the blood test that the doctor order. Mainly because I'll have to pay for this blood test out of pocket. (yay) If I wait a couple weeks, I can see the docs at the University, and it will all be free. The problem is, Im still feeling my aches and pains, and with this blood slip in my hands, I just want to know if this is attributed to something that can be detected in my blood.

Part of me says that I might as well wait the 2 weeks anyway. Either way my school insurance will cover the University doctors anyway. The other part wants to know whats going on, and is willing to pay the money to find out. CLS Boy wants me to get the blood test done. He says he's not worried, but I know he is. He's been bugging me to get it done since I got the blood slip last week. I told him I'd get it today, but my parents said not to get it done, wait for the insurance and save some money. Part of me gets so mad hearing this, because they saw me with my aches and pains the other day. I couldnt do anything. They're sticking to the "The Doctor said its nothing" philosophy. Even so, if its all psychological (which I highly doubt it is), I'd still like to know I need a shrink.

I'm not worried. I honestly think I have something that requires conservative treatment. At least if I knew that, I could do what I have to do. But what if Im wrong? I hate this period of waiting for my stupid health care to kick in. I'm ready to fly to India for some ayurvedic care by the beach.

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