Monday, July 26, 2004

Sometimes I hate getting mail.

Especially when its from the company where Im getting my financial aid from to let me know that as from this day forth, Im in debt.

Does this make me one step closer to being an All-American?

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Hey Blogger!

Whats up? Not much here. When I say not much here, I mean in my present locale. Although there is always something going on in my head. Sometimes things can be going on not here that concern me. Like in California somewhere. Concerning a certain law student boy.

Let me paraphrase by saying, he's great. The other day he sent me a package that contained a t-shirt from his university, and the book "A Day in the Life of the Soviet Union." (I saw it at his place and had wanted to read it, so he sent it) He is really open with me, and I've learned to be pretty open with him (I still need work). He listens if I complain about the same things, when I talk about stupid things, and even if Im just singing a song out of tune. I can get his opinion on anything, and he's just so darn smart. He's open to new ideas, and he's very sincere.

With that being said, we've talked about his Ex a few times. He swears up and down that he would never want anything with her again.

She's going to visit him for a couple days. She arrives today.

The logical side of me says : "There is no way any relationship type thing will happen. I know it. We've talked about this, he knows I will kill him if it does. Plus, Im hot stuff AND tough stuff, he'd be stupid to even try anything."

Add the feelings, and this what generates: "Why does she have to be there? Why is she still so dependent on him? I hate it. This sucks. WHy do I have to feel crappy!"

I know him and I have beaten this topic to the ground. I wouldnt want him to tell me not to talk to any of my friends, regardless if they are an ex or not. Yesterday, I was just so bugged I didnt really want to talk to him. He asked me what was wrong. At this point, I feel retarded telling him because we've really discussed it all we can, and the only thing I can do is trust him. So I just keep quiet and say that everything is fine. Because thats how it should be.

He said that I can call anytime. (He said it would be rude to make a call with a guest there) I feel weird calling knowing that she is there. Im not checking in on him, I dont want my phone calls to be taken that way.

For the next couple days, Im going to be on edge. If my hair grew out enough, I'd be getting a haircut. Instead, Im going to spend the weekend in NYC. I have people I can spend time with too. Plus, if Im having fun, I will devote less time to harvesting a stress ulcer in my tummy.

Other than that, all is well. I have the apartment, I've lost 2 pounds, and I weighed myself after eating a Double Chocolate donut from Dunkin Donuts. I have money in the bank for the moment. I did get my cell phone bill yesterday, and it was a little higher than expected. I hate that. YOu think a bill is going to be a certain amount and they stick you will all the roaming charges on one bill. Thats shit! I have a tuna fish wrap for lunch. I need to learn how to wrap a wrap so the tuna doesnt ooze out the back end. Has someone invented edible tape?

Thats about all from my world. Its sunny today. A great day for a hike. Hope you are keeping well too. Talk to you soon! Take Care!


Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Life's been good. Can't complain.

But I will.

I got an apartment with my dear friend on Sunday. I was soooooooooo excited! The worst thing in the world is when something really good happens to you, and you dont have anyone to celebrate with.

I immediately called CLS Boy, and we celebrated across cellular airwaves. Then I came home to an empty house. So I called about 6 people, and no one was home. Somehow my excitement died down. (You know, even when I got accepted into school, I called a whole bunch of people, and no one was home except CLS Boy!) It turned into a little bit of guilt, thinking of some of my parents money I'll have to spend. My mom wasnt too thrilled, since she likes having me around. I know its time to go, and I need to do this in order to move on in my life.

I guess I felt a little sad. Im taking my bed with me. So when I come home to visit,
I'll be sleeping in the GUEST bedroom. Im not a guest in a house I've been inhabiting for 17 years. (Not a complete 17...I did manage to break away to attend college and do some other things) All my stuff is there from years and years. Part of me feels bad to leave my parents, since we keep getting bad news about the status of their health. I feel like Im running out on them. Logically I know this is not the case, and Im only 20 minutes away. Its just different when you're there if something can always do something.

Then I came to work on Monday and snapped out of it. My friends at work quickly found out about our new home and asked when the party was going to be.

Oh yes. Im going to throw my first party in my house. Then I realized all the freedom I'll have, and remembered why I was moving out in the first place. I'll never truly become my own person if Im living by a standard which someone else set for me. Its time to set my own.

Sunday, July 18, 2004

One last thing...

Im completely computer/electronics illiterate. I need to get a new laptop for school. Any recommendations?
As of 1:20pm EST, I became a homeowner for the first time!!!

Well, my friend and I are renting an apartment together. But I signed a lease!! Yay!!

I'm finally moving away from home. Even though away is only 20 minutes, its still away.

Saturday, July 17, 2004

Go and read Pua's recent post. Her account on a beautiful, life changing experience will just leave you in awe.

Be prepared. Get the tissues.

Doctor's orders.

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

I came back from vacation exactly one week ago today. It feels like an eternity and I think I need another vacation.

Although I cant take another vacation. I have one month left of work, then I take 2 weeks off, and its back to school for me! I get to add a few more letters at the end of my name. Im paying way too much money for this. When I saw the bill, I wanted to call and let them know that I wanted an education and not to buy one of the buildings on campus. Just to learn something because everyone keeps talking about how a mind is a beautiful thing to waste and I dont want to waste mine.

I have a lot to do, and I want to relax. Im going apartment hunting with my new soon-to-be-roomie this week.

Then I'll really have to pour out my money...I need a laptop. We'll have to buy accessories for the new place, we need a couch, I need more sheets (although I could steal some from my parents house), books for school, the all important brand new back to school bag, new notebooks, and a couple new school clothes (necessity!!). Im sure there are other things on the list I've left out.

This is why I cant take another vacation. Its so sad. I'm so talented at vacationing. Another beautiful talent...wasted.