Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Life's been good. Can't complain.

But I will.

I got an apartment with my dear friend on Sunday. I was soooooooooo excited! The worst thing in the world is when something really good happens to you, and you dont have anyone to celebrate with.

I immediately called CLS Boy, and we celebrated across cellular airwaves. Then I came home to an empty house. So I called about 6 people, and no one was home. Somehow my excitement died down. (You know, even when I got accepted into school, I called a whole bunch of people, and no one was home except CLS Boy!) It turned into a little bit of guilt, thinking of some of my parents money I'll have to spend. My mom wasnt too thrilled, since she likes having me around. I know its time to go, and I need to do this in order to move on in my life.

I guess I felt a little sad. Im taking my bed with me. So when I come home to visit,
I'll be sleeping in the GUEST bedroom. Im not a guest in a house I've been inhabiting for 17 years. (Not a complete 17...I did manage to break away to attend college and do some other things) All my stuff is there from years and years. Part of me feels bad to leave my parents, since we keep getting bad news about the status of their health. I feel like Im running out on them. Logically I know this is not the case, and Im only 20 minutes away. Its just different when you're there if something happens...you can always do something.

Then I came to work on Monday and snapped out of it. My friends at work quickly found out about our new home and asked when the party was going to be.

Oh yes. Im going to throw my first party in my house. Then I realized all the freedom I'll have, and remembered why I was moving out in the first place. I'll never truly become my own person if Im living by a standard which someone else set for me. Its time to set my own.

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